The Undying Hope: My Battle with Fibroids

It was 2009, a week before my birthday, just like every year, when I visited my OBGYN for my annual well-woman exam. A neat little trick to ensure I never forgot. This yearly ritual, so familiar and often uneventful, was about to take a sudden twist. As I sat in the sterile exam room post-checkup, I noticed the doctor's brow furrow as he gazed at my chart.

"Do you occasionally feel any pain or discomfort in your lower navel?" he asked.

"No," I replied, trying to recall any unusual sensations.

"And has your monthly cycle changed or gotten heavier?"

"No."

His eyes met mine, concern evident. "There seems to be some growth scattered around your fallopian tubes and uterus," he informed me. "I want to send you for an MRI, but don't worry. It's fibroid, and I don’t believe surgery is necessary at this time." I never expected to hear the word "surgery" in relation to my own body, and yet there it was, hanging heavy in the room. Before I knew it, I was learning words like "fibroids," "MRI," and "fallopian." The clinical jargon barely registered. All I knew was that I had unexpected growths. I tried focusing on the doctor's reassurance, "There is nothing to worry about." But, can such news ever be easily digested?

Little did I know, this was just the beginning of a long journey with fibroids.

Years passed, and by 2015, my body began sending alarm signals. The cramps and pain, familiar but bearable, had intensified. Pain, intense and excruciating, became a monthly guest. My period got heavier, which lead to anemia and my energy sapped. The earlier diagnosis of fibroids, which had almost become an afterthought, now stormed back into focus. Surgery became the recommended course of action.

The fear wasn't just about the surgery, but the scar it would inevitably leave. I wondered if this would compromise my ability to carry children in the future. In a whirlwind decision amidst the chaos, I chose to visit a fertility clinic to preserve my eggs. Within a short span, I underwent two IVF cycles, harvested and stored eggs, and finally braced for the myomectomy in June 2015.

The surgery, executed by one of the best in the field, was smoother than anticipated. While the typical healing time was predicted to be 2-3 weeks, my resilience saw me bouncing back on the fifth day.

However, the battle was far from over. Fibroids, as I was learning, were not to be underestimated. By 2018, the fibroids had made a comeback, leading to my first hysteroscopy—a procedure that examines the inside of the uterus. Unfortunately, complications arose, necessitating a second one just four months later. The following year, another hysteroscopy was done, followed by a laparoscopy, a procedure to examine the organs inside the abdomen.

Fact Box: Hysteroscopy is a minimally invasive procedure that allows doctors to look inside the uterus to diagnose and treat causes of abnormal bleeding. It may be done in a doctor’s office or operating room with local, regional or general anesthesia. In some cases, little or no anesthesia is needed. The procedure poses little risk for most women. Laparoscopy or keyhole surgery, on the other hand, is a surgical diagnostic procedure to examine the organs inside the abdomen as well as perform surgery.

With a new decade came new hopes. My husband and I decided to try and conceive. The joy of discovering my pregnancy was short-lived with unsuccessful IVFs and miscarriages. Miscarriages at two months became an unfortunate pattern, taking a toll not just on me, but my supportive husband. Subsequent tests revealed accumulation of fluid and scars on my womb, likely remnants of the many surgeries. The fluids returning each time they are drained.

The miscarriages dampened my hopes but never extinguished them. Despite the tribulations, the idea of motherhood remained a luminous beacon in my life.

Amidst these challenges, my husband, witnessing the emotional and physical toll on me, suggested surrogacy. But my resolve was unshaken. Surrogacy remained a last resort, an option I'd consider only after every other avenue had been explored. We still had preserved eggs, and in my heart, I believed in their potential.

Fibroids are a daunting foe, affecting a significant portion of women globally. Though my journey has been tumultuous, it's the undying hope, the unwavering belief that everything will align in its own time, that keeps me moving forward. In the face of adversity, with or without fibroids, I believe life always finds a way. My journey has been fraught with pain, uncertainty, and heartbreak, but through it all, my hope remains undiminished. Every month, even with the pain and heavy flow, serves as a reminder of the tenacity of my spirit and body.

I firmly believe in nature's clock and its divine timing. "In God's time," I whisper to myself, "With or without fibroids, our time will come."

Fact Box: Fibroids are non-cancerous growths that develop in or around the womb (uterus). Though they're commonly found in women during their 30s and 40s, they can occur at any age, just like mine. Symptoms vary, with some women experiencing severe symptoms, while others might not even be aware they have a fibroid. According to statistics, up to 1 in 3 women develop fibroids at some point in their life.

Lately, I've discovered a mysterious tool that's changed the game for my pains and cramps - the Menstrual Belt. Dare I say, it's become my secret weapon?

Have you ever battled with fibroids? How did you navigate through it? Share your journey in the comments; I'm eager to hear your story!

"Despite the Shadows, Light Will Shine Through"